![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/The-FEHDs-promotion-of-green-burials-in-the-Diamond-Hill-Columbarium-225x300.png\")
(The FEHD\u2019s promotion of green burials in the Diamond Hill Columbarium.)<\/p><\/div>\n
A Simple and Quick Handle<\/b><\/h2>\n
In Hong Kong, many families avoid the death talk because mentioning death might bring bad luck as perceived in Chinese culture. Mandy Kung\u2019s grandfather passed away in 2019 without talking about the funeral arrangements beforehand.<\/span><\/p>\nKung\u2019s parents decided to follow a conventional burial, namely, to preserve the ashes in a public columbarium niche after cremation. But after a long wait for a spare position, they only got one at the Tsang Tsui Columbarium, which is 50 kilometres away from her parents\u2019 home in Chai Wan. So they switched to garden burials, eventually casting the ashes in 2020 at the Cape Collinson Garden of Remembrance nearby.<\/span><\/p>\nA year later, Kung\u2019s grandmother died. Following the Chinese tradition of burying loved ones together, Kung\u2019s parents scattered her grandmother\u2019s ashes in the same garden, then added her grandmother\u2019s profile to the commemorative plaque they once set up for her grandfather.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nIt was as small as a mailbox, as Kung described, with a joint photo on it, which was made from the individual pictures of her grandparents.<\/span><\/p>\nKung felt that their consideration of burial options for her grandparents was more of a practical one. She has always learned from the news that there weren\u2019t enough public columbarium niches in Hong Kong, and the private ones were too expensive.<\/span><\/p>\nIn Hong Kong, private niches could cost from several thousand to tens of thousands of Hong Kong dollars, or even more than a million dollars. Although a public columbarium niche has a much lower price, it often requires a longer wait due to Hong Kong\u2019s shortage of land.<\/span><\/p>\nLok Chung, a funeral director and founder of Peace of Mind Funeral Services, considered the growing adoption of garden burials as a reflection of people\u2019s evolving attitude towards death and funerals. \u201cIn the past few years, it seems that people have become less insistent on the conventional funeral culture,\u201d Chung said, \u201cand developed a preference for simple treatment, which needs to be quicker, less troublesome, and also a lower price is better.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nThe passage of dealing with death<\/b><\/h2>\n
Every Saturday morning, a free ferry provided by the FEHD will depart for a designated sea area\uff0c allowing up to 25 families to scatter ashes. Yet, low cost has not convinced more people to adopt sea burials. The sailing could last for about five hours, from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., with the uncertainty of being cancelled because of weather conditions.<\/span><\/p>\n\u201cWe just want the simplest way to dispose of the ashes. Garden burial is the most convenient, since there is no need to wait a long time for a niche, nor does the arrangement have so many restrictions as in the case of sea burials,\u201d Kay Lam said, who scattered her parents\u2019 ashes in the Wo Hop Shek Garden of Remembrance, thinking that there was no use in keeping the ashes.<\/span><\/p>\nLam was a design student, and three years after her dad\u2019s garden burial, she could still draw a vivid sketch of the metal scattering device she held to scatter the ashes, which looks like a silver bucket with a handle controlling the speed of ashes falling.<\/span><\/p>\nFor her, the hardest part throughout the funeral was to \u201cpress the button\u201d\u2014the action which sends off the remains on the catafalque to be cremated. \u201cNo matter how I tried, I couldn\u2019t bear to push the button,\u201d said Lam, \u201cpressing that button means I\u2019ll never see them again.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nIt took over three months for the cremation and the plaque to be done. Slowly pulling up the handle of the metal scattering device, the gray and white ashes fell on the lawn little by little as Lam walked along the narrow path of the Garden of Remembrance. It was a quick process, only taking less than 15 minutes to finish.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n\u201cThese rituals were not done for the dead, but for the living to process their family\u2019s death,\u201d Lam said, \u201cfor me, I finally came to my parents\u2019 deaths when scattering the ashes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nLok Chung got his first garden burial case as a funeral director ten years ago. But letting the ashes fall out of a device seemed a bit cold to him. He preferred people to hold the ashes with bare hands and scatter them into the earth, as a symbolic gesture of letting it go, richer in ritual significance. Some families would accept his advice.<\/span><\/p>\nScattering ashes at sea suits those who prefer \u201ca decisive farewell,\u201d as Chung said. The family just needs to put the ashes in a biodegradable bag offered by the FEHD, then slide the bag down a slender black chute extending into the water. As the bag dissolves on its own, the ashes\u2014as described on the green burials\u2019 website\u2014will \u201cblend with nature and return to nature.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nJoseph Lau, a researcher who has published two books about Hong Kong\u2019s funeral industry, believed that what truly matters in a burial is the \u201csoft moment\u201d\u2014those tender, solemn instants that could linger in people\u2019s hearts longer than the ceremony.<\/span><\/p>\n\u201cHowever, the sea burial ceremony is very simple, and the most challenging point is that for some people, it is not very respectful of the dead,\u201d said Lau, \u201csome people care about their souls after death, and scattering ashes at sea seems like letting a soul drifting with no home to go.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nA Place for Remembrance<\/b><\/h2>\n
On April 3, the day before Ching Ming Festival, the ashes were easily noticed on the sparse lawns of the Tsang Tsui Garden of Remembrance, separated by short white fences and cobblestones along both sides of the pathways.<\/span><\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/The-scattered-ashes-alongside-the-pathways-in-the-Tsang-Tsui-Garden-of-Remembrance-300x169.png\")
The scattered ashes alongside the pathways in the Tsang Tsui Garden of Remembrance.<\/p><\/div>\n
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The whole garden remained remarkably clean, with no signs of burning incense or candles, nor the usual offerings of fruit or food that would normally appear in\u00a0 Chinese traditional commemoration. If people don\u2019t stay close to see those little commemorative plaques on the memorial walls, they might mistake the place for an ordinary park\u2014quiet, clean, even with a nice view of the sea.<\/span><\/p>\nThe panoramic view of the Tsang Tsui Garden of Remembrance.But step a little closer, there were tiny bouquets and countless miniatures tucked between the plaques, showing the vibrant personalities of the lives once lived. A small wine pot suggested someone who might love alcohol, and a tiny camera probably indicated that the person had a love for photography. Others included mini Yakult, Komeda coffee cups, dogs, motorcycles, and tiny replicas of delicacies from all over the world, telling stories of those past lives in silence.<\/span><\/p>\n\u201cThe reason garden burials are more acceptable than sea burials is that garden burials save the tradition of setting up a plaque for the deceased, so that people can come back every year to pay tributes,\u201d said Jennifer Choi, a funeral director. Now, half of the families coming to her would choose garden burials, while she has only received two sea burial cases during her five years working in the funeral industry.<\/span><\/p>\n\u201cIf you choose your ashes to be scattered at sea, there’s really nothing left,\u201d she said.<\/span><\/p>\nHaving a settled place for memorial visits was an important rite for Kung and her parents, so they didn\u2019t choose garden over sea burials for her grandparents. They used to bring a large pack of paper-made offerings to the garden and burned them on-site, but with the joss paper burners now requiring booking, they brought only food and flowers this Ching Ming.<\/span><\/p>\nKung\u2019s mother put the flowers in a water bottle and left them on the ground just below her grandparents\u2019 plaque. Following Chinese worship traditions, they placed the food in front of the memorial wall as a sign of respect and love to their ancestors and then took it home with them.<\/span><\/p>\nThe entire visit lasted no more than thirty minutes, but they came here at every Ching Ming and Chung Yeung Festivals. They rarely spoke, just standing among the memorial walls, blending into the stillness.<\/span><\/p>\nLighting incense and candles has long been a necessary part of the Chinese memorial ceremony. Considering the limited space between memorial walls, burning candles and leaving offerings are prohibited in the Garden of Remembrance, but many people still do so.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nOn April 8, a staff member surnamed Ng was using a slender spade to scrape away the marks on the ground left by the melted candles in the Garden of Remembrance at Junk Bay Chinese Permanent Cemetery. Then she dragged a big black garbage bag to clear out the bouquets and other offerings left behind. On the day of Ching Ming, she had filled 15 such big garbage bags.<\/span><\/p>\nAlthough Lam believed that the ashes didn\u2019t matter that much, she was still shocked last year when she found the lawn where her mother\u2019s ashes were scattered had been flushed away by the heavy rain.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n\u201cI was like, \u2018Oh, my mother has been washed away,\u2019\u201d said Lam, \u201cbut I clearly knew deep down that my mum\u2019s ashes had gone to who knows where long ago.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/The-panoramic-view-of-the-Tsang-Tsui-Garden-of-Remembrance-300x169.png\")
The panoramic view of the Tsang Tsui Garden of Remembrance<\/p><\/div>\n
New way for grief, or not<\/b><\/h2>\n
The FEHD has provided free ferry rides during the grave-sweeping season since 2014, taking the families to the designated sea areas where their loved ones\u2019 ashes were scattered.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nStarting from 2020, the number of these trips doubled from four to eight each year, but still insufficient. Two weeks before this Ching Ming Festival, the green burial website had already noticed that all spots for the memorial sailings had been filled.<\/span><\/p>\nBut there might be another way to grieve.<\/span><\/p>\nThroughout the Cape Collinson Garden of Remembrance, signs directed visitors to a site called \u201cdigital worshipping station,\u201d though the facility looked nothing more than a faded green container from the outside. One of the notices on the door read: \u201cFacility damaged, temporarily closed.\u201d\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nThe abandoned digital worshipping station at the Cape Collinson Garden of Remembrance.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt hasn\u2019t been used in a long time. You can download a mobile app for online memorials,\u201d a staff member said, pointing to a stack of green burial brochures with one page saying, \u201cuse internet memorial service, pay tribute anytime, anywhere.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nThis referred to the memorial website published by the FEHD in 2010, where people can create memorial pages for their loved ones. Families and friends could write the deceased\u2019s life story and upload photos and videos to these pages, with an option to set it as public or private.<\/span><\/p>\nBut Lam wasn\u2019t convinced. \u201cIt sounds a bit boring,\u201d she chuckled, \u201cif writing online helps, leaving messages for my parents on Facebook is just the same.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nDeath in an unbound generation<\/b><\/h2>\n
Mathew Cheng is a funeral director who also founded a social enterprise to sort the belongings of the dead. To him, the growing acceptance of ash scattering indicated a deeper change in Hong Kong: a new generation that values a free and unburdened way of life, even in how they choose to say goodbye to their deceased beloved ones.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nIn Chinese society, where the concept of family runs deep, the graveyard serves as a physical embodiment of inheritance\u2014a place where the family\u2019s history is grounded in stone and earth.<\/span><\/p>\n\u201cBut now, after scattering the ashes, people would think that the inheritance lives on in their hearts,\u201d Cheng said, \u201cat the same time, they see themselves and their dead loved ones all as free beings.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nCheng spotted this feature from the photos that people choose to put on the plaques. Unlike those conventional, serious photos in the past, many people now prefer a more personalised display on their plaque. One of his many garden burial cases, the photo on the plaque showed an elderly couple posing in the Himalayas wearing sunglasses.<\/span><\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/The-abandoned-digital-worshipping-station-at-the-Cape-Collinson-Garden-of-Remembrance-300x169.png\")
The abandoned digital worshipping station at the Cape Collinson Garden of Remembrance<\/p><\/div>\n
\u201cThese photos reflect a stronger sense of freedom in this new generation,\u201d Cheng said. \u201cThey\u2019re not subject to rules; they take life as it comes.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nLike Jake Tsui, who has decided to have sea burials with her parents and brother, death was never a taboo topic in her family since childhood.<\/span><\/p>\nTsui once had an older brother, who passed away at ten months old because a blanket accidentally covered his face, cutting off his breath. The loss was a huge blow to Tsui\u2019s parents, and since then, they have determined to have sea burials together with their first son, for the feeling of being free, not stuck in one place anymore.<\/span><\/p>\nWhen Tsui was around seven years old, one night as her mother was reading the Bible with her, they first talked about the concept of death. Her mother explained that death meant that one day she and Tsui\u2019s father would no longer be there by Tsui\u2019s side.<\/span><\/p>\nTsui remembered herself crying hard that night, but over time, she began to understand.<\/span><\/p>\nHer older brother\u2019s ashes were well-kept in a glass cabinet in their house so that \u201che could always see the family and be part of their daily life,\u201d her parents told her. Next to the urn sat a small photo of her brother, and a red envelope which her parents would change to a new one with a bit of money in it during Chinese New Year and on his birthday.<\/span><\/p>\nWhen her parents told her about their sea burial plans, Tsui recalled: \u201cI told them, \u2018Alright, you guys can go travel around the world first. I\u2019ll come find you later.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\nTo Tsui and her family, the most important thing that life has taught them is to cherish the time with those they love while they are still alive.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n\u201cAs for after death? Might as well be free,\u201d said Tsui. \u201cJust let the sea carry us.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n <\/p>\n
Advisor: Wenxin Fan<\/span><\/p>\n[\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
(People paying tributes to the deceased in the Diamond Hill Garden of Remembrance.) The Choice of Letting Your Loved One Go: Behind Hong Kong\u2019s Push for Green Burials By Yonger Shen During his morning hikes half an hour from his neighbourhood in Chai Wan, Elvis Tsang, an accountant, sometimes takes a detour from the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":67,"featured_media":9330,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"
For Rena and her partner, Tia, starting a family in Hong Kong has meant navigating a maze of legal and logistical barriers. Because same-sex couples are barred from accessing in vitro fertilization (IVF) at home, the lesbian couple must travel overseas for every attempt to have a child\u2014juggling work schedules, medical appointments and mounting expenses along the way.<\/span><\/p>\u201cOur biggest obstacle is we cannot do IVF in Hong Kong. Flying overseas makes everything more complicated,\u201d said Rena, who asked to use an alias.<\/span><\/p>Rena\u2019s struggle highlights a broader issue: Many same-sex couples and single women in Hong Kong face major barriers to having children. As the city\u2019s birth rate falls to record lows, whether same-sex couples can become parents\u2014through assisted reproductive technology or adoption\u2014will help determine not only whether Hong Kong can become a more inclusive and dynamic society, but also whether it will embrace nontraditional families as part of the solution to the city\u2019s demographic crisis.<\/span><\/p>Many Would-Be Parents<\/b><\/p>
Some academics and advocates believe that expanding parental rights for same-sex couples and single women could be part of the solution. According to a 2022 academic survey by Dr. Lo Wai-luen and colleagues at Hong Kong Polytechnic University, about half of lesbians in Hong Kong would like to have children, and 92 percent believe same-sex couples should be allowed to use assisted reproductive technology such as IVF. \u201cSeventy percent of Hong Kong residents in same-sex relationships want to get married,\u201d said Suen Yiu-tung, a professor at the Chinese University of Hong Kong.<\/span><\/p>Recent court decisions in Hong Kong have granted some rights to same-sex couples, such as equal housing and inheritance, but parental rights remain out of reach. Same-sex couples still cannot jointly adopt children or access assisted reproductive technology like IVF.<\/span><\/p>![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/Screenshot-2025-06-09-at-12.28.11\u202fAM-1024x889.png\")
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Partner rights in Hong Kong, compiled by Dear Family Hong Kong, Gay Harmony and Onebookhalf Gender Space<\/span><\/i><\/p>As a result, unmarried women and same-sex couples are forced to seek fertility treatments abroad.<\/span><\/p>Rena has been with her partner, Tia, who also requested an alias, for more than six years. The couple plans to have two babies at a New York clinic, each carrying the other\u2019s egg so their children share biological ties with both mothers.<\/span><\/p>\u201cEach attempt requires at least a three-week leave, and it often takes multiple tries. We have to arrange hotels and flights, be precise about the dates to match the hormone cycle, and negotiate with our colleagues for time off. If we could do it in Hong Kong, it would save us so much trouble and disruption to our work,\u201d said Rena.<\/span><\/p>\u201cSame-sex marriage in Hong Kong is a luxury dream,\u201d said Rena.<\/span><\/p>![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/WhatsApp-Image-2025-05-15-at-21.27.50-1-683x1024.jpeg\")
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Tia, left, and Rena, right. (Courtesy of Tia and Rena)<\/span><\/i><\/p>Compared with legalizing same-sex marriage, Tia believes legalizing IVF for single women could happen sooner and with less resistance. \u201cThe government wants people to have more babies. Single women having babies does no harm.\u201d<\/span><\/p>According to the World Population Review, Hong Kong\u2019s birth rate in 2025 is 5.43 births per 1,000 people, the second lowest in the world, just above South Korea.<\/span><\/p>This low fertility rate exacerbates the demographic challenge. Hong Kong\u2019s population is rapidly aging while its workforce shrinks. United Nations projections indicate that by 2050, nearly 35 percent of Hong Kong\u2019s population will be aged 65 or older. Meanwhile, the total population is expected to decline significantly, from about 7.4 million in 2023 to potentially below 6.5 million by 2065. This demographic shift threatens economic growth, strains healthcare and social welfare systems, and increases the dependency ratio\u2014meaning fewer working-age adults will need to support a growing elderly population.<\/span><\/p>\u201cIt is imperative that the government set a firm policy direction to encourage childbearing amid our persistently low birth rate,\u201d Chief Executive John Lee said in his 2023 policy address.<\/span><\/p>Landmark Legal Case\u00a0<\/b><\/p>
The Hong Kong LGBTQ+ community\u2019s pursuit of same-sex marriage reached a pivotal milestone in September 2023 with the Court of Final Appeal\u2019s ruling in Sham Tsz Kit v. Secretary for Justice. Jimmy Sham, a Hong Kong permanent resident who legally married his partner in New York in 2013, challenged the government\u2019s refusal to recognize same-sex marriages or provide any legal framework for same-sex couples. The Court ruled by a narrow 3\u20132 majority that, while same-sex couples do not have a constitutional right to marry under Hong Kong law, the government must establish an \u201calternative legal framework\u201d within two years\u2014such as civil unions or registered partnerships\u2014that grants same-sex couples rights and protections equivalent to those of marriage.<\/span><\/p>This landmark decision is significant because it acknowledges that excluding same-sex couples from legal recognition constitutes unconstitutional discrimination under the right to privacy and equality protections enshrined in the Hong Kong Bill of Rights. The ruling obliges the government to provide legal recognition that could include rights related to inheritance, medical decisions and family security\u2014areas where same-sex couples have long faced legal uncertainty and vulnerability.<\/span><\/p>The Court set a deadline of September 2025 for the government to enact this framework. However, months after the ruling, the government has yet to conduct public consultations or release any draft proposals, raising concerns among advocates about potential delays or inadequate measures.<\/span><\/p>\u201cI have no expectations for the September legislation. No expectations, no disappointment,\u201d said Jeanne Cheung, a lesbian who wants a baby in the near future.<\/span><\/p>Her pessimism is not unwarranted. In the months since the court\u2019s decision, local NGOs, academics and lawyers say the government has neither conducted public consultation nor released a draft proposal.<\/span><\/p>But time is not on Cheung\u2019s side. At 32, she hopes to have a child before her biological window closes. \u201cA woman\u2019s fertility, especially after age 30, can decline dramatically. So if you want a baby, you\u2019d better act early,\u201d said Dr. Huang Lili of Incita IVF Center.<\/span><\/p>In a group chat called \u201cBaby Project,\u201d Cheung and her LGBTQ+ friends exchange information on navigating the city\u2019s legal and medical labyrinths to build families of their own.<\/span><\/p>![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/5418d580a88e9f2896f0d6a638590665-2-1024x683.jpg\")
<\/span><\/i><\/p>Cheung, right, and her partner, left. (Photo by Yi Luo)\u00a0<\/span><\/i><\/p>Initially, Cheung considered intrauterine insemination (IUI), a simpler and less expensive fertility treatment compared to IVF. In IUI, doctors place sperm directly into the uterus around the time of ovulation, hoping it will fertilize an egg naturally inside the body. \u201cIt does not require surgery or the extraction of eggs. And the cost is much lower. But the success rate is low, only 10 to 15 percent,\u201d said Dr. Huang.<\/span><\/p>As Cheung\u2019s window narrowed, she switched to IVF for a higher success rate and quicker results, preparing at least HK$500,000 (about $64,000 U.S.) for overseas treatment.<\/span><\/p>It\u2019s not just the financial burden. The emotional toll can be heavy. Same-sex couples often face a lack of social support, and their families or even hospitals may turn them away.<\/span><\/p>Cheung said many same-sex couples experience postpartum depression or anxiety about raising a child. \u201cI highly recommend people seek community support and help. For example, spend time with same-sex couples who have children\u2014you\u2019ll feel less intimidated,\u201d Cheung said.<\/span><\/p>\u201cThe world has a lot of fun, so I want to invite my child to enjoy the world and feel joy with me,\u201d she said.<\/span><\/p>If the September legislation can protect parental rights, such as granting her partner guardianship of their child, Cheung said they would be more likely to register. But left in the current legal limbo, same-sex couples that want to be parents are forced to go to great lengths to start a family.<\/span><\/p>Two Moms and One Dad<\/b><\/p>
\u201cGiving birth is saving lives. My babies\u2019 father told me that,\u201d said 34-year-old Cais Chan. Unlike most lesbian couples, Chan and her partner want their children to have a father figure.<\/span><\/p>Chan grew up in a harmonious family, and her heterosexual parents\u2019 loving relationship inspired her lifelong dream of having a happy family of her own.<\/span><\/p>\u201cWhen I was 25, seeing my friends\u2019 kids, I was overwhelmed by a strong maternal instinct. They spark so much joy and healing,\u201d she recalls.<\/span><\/p>Yet, growing up in a traditional culture, Chan once believed she had to follow her parents\u2019 path and marry a man to realize her dream of motherhood. Out of instinct, she began orchestrating a \u201cfake marriage\u201d with gay friends, a common practice among LGBTQ people in conservative environments to satisfy parents and avoid discrimination.<\/span><\/p>But the process proved far from simple. During her search, she encountered a misogynistic man. \u201cI don\u2019t want my kids\u2019 dad to be someone who hates women,\u201d Chan said. Disputes over child-rearing and the prospect of living under the same roof with somebody she doesn\u2019t love also terrified her.<\/span><\/p>![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/IMG_5031-1024x683.jpg\")
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Hong Kong Cotton Tree Drive Marriage Registry. (Photo by Yi Luo)<\/span><\/i><\/p>Even later, she found a gay friend she got along with. His family discovered the arrangement and blamed her for his sexuality. \u201cYou devil, you taught my little brother to be gay,\u201d his sister accused.<\/span><\/p>Chan realized that such \u201cfake marriages\u201d would never give her children a happy family, and, after eight years of trial and error, she decided last year to have children without marrying a man.<\/span><\/p>In 2024, Chan met Daniel Bayen, a volunteer sperm donor from Germany. After reviewing his health records and background, Chan had candid conversations with Bayen by video and in person.<\/span><\/p>She shared her concerns about potential discrimination her children might face. Bayen reassured her: \u201cI grew up with my mom. But I\u2019m still happy and proud.\u201d As it turned out, Bayen\u2019s mother was also a single woman who had him with the help of a sperm donor. Empathetic and caring, Bayen agreed to play the role of father figure, video calling the children and meeting regularly as they grow up.<\/span><\/p>\u201cMy kids will have two moms and a daddy, and it works fine. We all love them so much,\u201d said Chan.<\/span><\/p>Legal Gaps Remain<\/b><\/p>
Because of a patchwork of court rulings, Hong Kong same-sex couples who married abroad are granted certain rights, such as immigration, tax benefits, housing and inheritance, that were once reserved for heterosexual couples. Yet the most significant gap remains: parental rights.<\/span><\/p>In Hong Kong, single women and unmarried couples are barred from accessing IVF and other assisted reproductive procedures. Many couples are forced to seek costly treatments overseas, with a single IVF cycle ranging from HK$100,000 to HK$250,000, and success often requires multiple attempts.<\/span><\/p>![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/IVF-\u8d39\u7528-1024x683.jpg\")
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IVF fees in different countries, according to Future Family, an information platform. (Photo by Yi Luo)<\/span><\/i><\/p>Adoption is not a panacea either. Joint adoption by same-sex couples is not allowed in Hong Kong. Adopting as an individual makes the applicant less competitive than married heterosexual couples, as the court considers the child\u2019s interests as the central principle. Even if adopted, that risks the child having only one legal guardian.<\/span><\/p>A Shifting Public Mood, an Outdated Law<\/b><\/p>
Despite these hurdles, public sentiment is changing. Support for same-sex marriage in Hong Kong has surged from 38 percent in 2013 to 60 percent in 2023, with only 17 percent opposed and 23 percent neutral, according to a study by the University of Hong Kong, the Chinese University of Hong Kong and the University of North Carolina.<\/span><\/p>![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/Picture1-300x165.png\")
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Source:\u00a0 Support in Hong Kong for Same-sex Couples\u2019 Rights Grew Over Ten Years (2013-2023) by the University of Hong Kong, the Chinese University of Hong Kong, and the University of North Carolina<\/span><\/i><\/p>The same survey found that more than 85 percent of residents believe same-sex couples should have at least some of the rights enjoyed by different-sex couples, including hospital visitation and inheritance.<\/span><\/p>![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/992532fe50af3e7ccbb4638139f77533-1024x683.jpeg\")
<\/span><\/i><\/p>History of HK LGBTQ+ movements, Pride Market 2024. (Photo: Yi Luo)<\/span><\/i><\/p>Yet the law remains frozen in time. Hong Kong\u2019s Marriage Ordinance, last updated in 1971, defines marriage as a union between \u201cone man and one woman,\u201d and even stipulates that marriage can be voided if either party is incapable of \u201cconsummation,\u201d which is narrowly defined as penile-vaginal penetration. This not only excludes same-sex couples but also discriminates against heterosexual couples unable or unwilling to have such intercourse.<\/span><\/p>Conservative Legislature<\/b><\/p>
Lawmaker Junius Ho, known for his critical attitudes toward the LGBTQ community, is a fierce opponent of legalizing same-sex marriage in Hong Kong.<\/span><\/p>\u201cThe monogamous and heterosexual marriage system is protected under the Basic Law and the Hong Kong Bill of Rights. It is the cornerstone of traditional families and must be upheld,\u201d Ho said in a Legislative Council motion debate on Feb. 12, 2025. On that day, Ho moved a motion titled \u201cUpholding the monogamous and heterosexual marriage system in Hong Kong,\u201d which was passed at the meeting. \u201cWe cannot allow foreign values like same-sex marriage to undermine our social fabric.\u201d<\/span><\/p>![\"\"](\"https:\/\/jmsc6110a.com\/capstone2025\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/06\/IMG_5034-1024x683.jpg\")
<\/span><\/i><\/p>Hong Kong Cotton Tree Drive Marriage Registry. (Photo: Yi Luo)<\/span><\/i><\/p>Lawmaker Regina Ip argues that monogamy is a modern legal principle established after the founding of the People\u2019s Republic of China, not a traditional Chinese value. She cited historical Chinese marriage customs as \u201cone man, one wife, multiple concubines,\u201d emphasizing that polygamy was the norm in ancient China. Yet she cautiously avoids activism. She abstained from voting on the motion.<\/span><\/p>